h1

transition?

January 4, 2007

First post of the year?

Plenty of things to update about. Many thoughts, many dreams, many doubts, many frustrations. Somehow, phrases in my sentences, like to rhyme like a simple whine. Honestly, rhyming isn’t really intentional unless it’s a poem. Oh well~

Just a thought to keep track of:

To know people you don’t know personally, you gotta actually meet them at least once or twice… Otherwise, how’d you ever know them personally if you’ve never seen the other in person?

— it will only be a contradiction

A friend, Mf, asked, “what’s your purpose of playing here? friends? fun?“. It’s both for me. Especially since, I did meet M and E from MS. Just coincidentally, M happens to enter the same uni as I’m in. So the friendship kinda extended out from the game world. It may sound crazy to some people, reminding me of how I’d reacted in the past, that meeting game friends is a nice thing to do.

Yeah, people may lie to you about themselves. People may trick you into doing stupid stuff. Then again, it’s the era, where you can judge people from the way they interact in the games themselves. I think Mf would agree with this. No, I haven’t seen Mf in person =) Even my other friend E, I haven’t met E in person either. I wanted to, but somehow wasn’t destined to.

Anyway, I’d thought this time around, I won’t want to get cheated by opportunities or time. I wanted to make full use of what’s there. If I could have it, I’d go for it. If I could meet, I will. It’s not a question of “why bother?” It’s more of what I want out of it. The friends I’ve made since the past month, have something in common somewhat. It’s either the experiences they’ve shared or perhaps it’s the age range that keeps us together. It’s the conversations that stick us together, if it isn’t the challenge we get from the game. It’s not a matter of whether they’re just a fig of the internet created by themselves. It’s a matter of trust in our friendship.

Interesting, how people meet without seeing one another and they can sometimes feel the other. There are those who can even analyse. Pro.

There are those who can’t fully express themselves or grammatically, and yet I understand them. Problem is, I don’t know if they understand me.

Mf asked me to write a poem for reads, so here it is:

lost

there you are
yet i’m bothered
again there you are
yet i’m frustrated

i don’t hate you
i don’t mind your presence
i’m okay with two
i’m okay with the silence

silence may bore
i know it does
yet i don’t know
if it will last us

there’s the button
that’s holding me back
maybe the glutton
is keeping me in check

what if
you left me
what if
it was just me

what if
i missed out
something greater out there
such that i’ll shout
“it isn’t fair!”

is it just me
my selfishness
is it just me
my greediness

i’m lost
am i to say yes
am i to try
or am i to say “god bless,”
“this is goodbye”

someone tell me
pray tell
what to do of me
please ring a bell

i’m only human
release this guilt
of confusing emotions
that has been built

please
pretty please

Lost or just undecided. Or are they the same…

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3 comments

  1. found

    i’ve found a friend
    who is an art in motion

    when she’s there for me
    things become unique
    scenes become beautiful
    existence is appreciated
    and my worth valued

    i could not find the right words
    but i can tell her what my heart desires to say

    at this sentence
    i’ve found my friend


  2. Poet moo moo…. @_@


  3. hehe~ when i feel like it moo =b

    bet u can’t write poems xD u doo doo!



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