bye D-X; bad

February 25, 2006

As much as I’m crestfallen that it’s gone
As much as I’m upset
As much as I know I can’t do anything but moan
As much as I know everything seems dead

I have to move on.

It’s so ironic. I had hoped to keep them all up online for fear of losing them in their actual hardcopies, the ones in my laptop. I had hoped they would stay there safe for me to look back into. I had hoped.

Reality has it that even machines have lifespans of their own. Even machines die. So, what more can I expect?

Should have just kept them all recorded in .txt form, regardless of being online or not.


Guess I’ll put up in here anyway. This time I’d better keep a local record too. None can predict the future.

Speaking of predictions, I had a bad premonition regarding what my yesterday was going to be like. There was just this foreboding that yesterday wasn’t going to go smooth. Why?

  • I didn’t have this feeling that I’ll see my writing tutor 
  • I didn’t have the exact excitement expected for the workshop
  • I didn’t have the exact happiness expected for shopping
  • I didn’t have the exact enthusiasm expected for the meeting

It was all so surreal. Everything came crashing on me. They were all indirect intuitions but they really hurt me big time. Friday really had me down the gallows big time. And it wasn’t even Friday the 13th.


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